“Don’t sweat the small stuff”?
Dude, I’m damp. I am sweating all the small stuff. It’s what I do.
Please don’t tell me how small the stuff is (I know this) and how, when it comes down to it, it’s all small stuff (it can’t all be small), and not to sweat any of it (now I need a towel) because all you are doing is stressing me the hell right out.
There is strain, tension, external pressure in our lives. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have it.
We all react differently, of course, but it seems that those who tend to feel uncomfortable about this are vilified by those who do not.
When people stress, we are often told to “relax” or “take it easy”. Yet, when someone does not stress, we don’t tell them to “get upset” or “freak out”.
How is this fair?
When people announce how laid-back they are, it’s annoying. I mean, I can either see that you are or I can see that you’re trying to convince me (or yourself) that you are. Either way, it’s unnecessary information.
If you don’t mind, skip the pleasantries and just get the salt shaker and start pouring it into the wound. It is patronizing to tell someone who is distressed to “calm down”.
It’s so incredibly wonderful that people can be calm, cool, and collected in the face of a stressful situation. It’s good for their health and lovely for those around them.
I recognize that this works for a lot of people. What I’d absolutely love is for them to realize not everyone has the ability to do that.
And, as far as I know, people don’t enjoy being stressed.
Next time you see someone in distress, instead of telling them to “lighten up”, try asking them “what’s up?”
How many times has, “Just calm down” worked for you or, rather, for the person you’re saying it to? Do they calm down? If so, is it immediate? Be honest here…has it ever worked?